Day 1: This is great. I’m having so much fun. “I’ll take one Coral Cove Daiquiri, please, and make it a double.”
Day 2: This is beyond great. Best vacation ever. Isn’t it funny how men keep emerging from behind palm trees to try and sell us cocaine. Haha!
Day 3: We should move to Las Vegas so we can enjoy the grandeur and spectacle of The Strip every day. We’ll work our way up in the gaming industry and make a fortune. I don’t ever want to go home. Black jack!
Day 4: Get me out of here! If I see another novelty sized daiquiri I’m going to vomit. If one more dreadlock-clad man tries to sell me “secret goodies” I’m going to punch him. “No, ma’am, I would not like to add a Budweiser tall boy to my breakfast burrito order for thirteen dollars.” Am I in hell? Somebody help!