Have you heard about these strange businesses that sell personalities to boring people? They’re called tattoo parlors.
If you’re disagreeable and dumb you should be allowed to supervise a whack-a-mole booth at a traveling carnival or pick fruit on an avocado plantation and literally nothing else.
Sun meets wave, the surface writhes with violent sparkles, and the pond is a crater of boiling lighting.
The same adjective should not be used to describe a toy poodle sweater and what I look like naked. That is why the right thing to do is to push a thesaurus into your girlfriend’s lap each time she uses the word “cute”.
“The best way to teach your child right from wrong is to scream yourself hoarse when they disobey. Then, when kids behave, you should be unresponsive, offering no praise.” “It’s a parenting method I call All Stick, No Carrot. It works. That’s what I did. Today, my children are so busy being productive members ofContinue reading “All Stick, No Carrot”
The poor souls pinned to the bottom of the status pyramid are robbed of life’s wholesomeness. For it is only the untouchables that have the eyes to see the mechanized transactions governing the dance of all human relations.
“Dismembered fetuses are progress and deer hunting is barbarism”, said Edie as she doodled the word RESIST onto the cover of her Michelle Obama notebook.
“It’s not a bike crash, it’s metacycling”, said the postmodernist, nose upturned, as he plowed his Schwinn into a juniper bush.
The catch-22-like tragedy of personality and ethics: Creativity and culture is often coupled with stomach turning leftism. Decent, honest, right-leaning people tend to be less than stellar conversation companions.
Earth would be an unbearable hellscape if snakes were covered it tight, curly, poodle-like hair.